I Endured a Kind of Burial (My Passion Story, part 3)

3 09 2011

God loves to have us wait. In fact, it is likely that right now you are waiting for something to happen, and God is saying “Wait.” I believe that God uses waiting in the life of His children as much or more than any other tool in His toolkit.

I large part of my passion story involves waiting. My wife took a long time to heal. She was puffed up on prednisone for a long, long time. And my ministry didn’t resume for a long, long time. I got an opportunity to do some Bible teaching on the radio, but it faltered and didn’t work out. I had to resign. Disappointment!

My daughters (then 17 and 15) also struggled big time with the aftermath of what had happened to us as a family. They missed Kenya and all their friends. They struggled with living in the USA, unable to find friends who could relate to their big view of the world. Together we all grieved and struggled with depression. To drive toward the hospital seemed like returning to prison. The days were long and dark–like a tomb.

It’s ironic: We all spend an inordinate amount of time in tomb-like experiences, where we can only wait on God to do something…to give a job, to heal a relationship, to reveal His will. Yet we are not very good at handling burial times. One friend put it this way: We don’t have a theology for Saturday. Jesus died on a Friday, and we know a bit about suffering and hardship. Jesus rose on Sunday, and we love to talk about resurrection. But Saturday? We aren’t so good at dwelling in our tomb, handling grief, loss, and delay.

Judging from experience, God considers it essential that we learn to wait. Remember when Lazarus was sick and sisters Mary and Martha called for Jesus to come heal him? Remember what Jesus did? He waited two days before responding. By the time He arrived, Lazarus had died. Mary and Martha were disappointed and upset.

But what do we learn? Jesus deliberately waited because the delay produced a greater miracle that brought Him more glory. Instead of a healing the people saw a resurrection!

The reason God made our family wait, and the reason He is making you wait, is because He intends to do something more glorious than you are currently hoping for.

Be encouraged by this: You story cannot end in the tomb. That is impossible, because of the very character of God.

And that leads to the best part…





I Died a Kind of Death (My Passion Story, part 2)

1 09 2011

I have a wonderful wife named Lyn, and two terrific daughters  Lauren and Heather. I even have a wonderful son-in-law, Peter who married Lauren. I was a pastor in California for eight years. Then God burdened our hearts with the challenge to go to Kenya and train pastors who had not gotten a chance to go to Bible school. So we went, and stayed there for 10 years, from 1990 to 2000. Those were great (and challenging) years we will never forget!

Toward the end of that time, Lyn was feeling progressively weak. The week before we left she was in the hospital in Nairobi to try to get enough strength for the journey to the States. We managed to get her on the plane and barely made it back to San Francisco before she passed out or even passed away. A couple of months later Lyn was diagnosed with acute leukemia. Chemotherapy did not quickly rid her body of the cancer, so she received a bone marrow transplant from her sister Cindy. (This is a very short version of events!)

To use a bit of understatement, this was a hugely difficult ordeal for the whole family. Lyn had some complications. She was in the hospital for 10 different stays, involving 144 days. But she survived, and is doing fine today!

But this was all a death-like experience for our family. We basically had to release her to whatever God chose to do, for the outcome was out of anyone’s hands, except His.

At the same time my ministry had to die. I was taking care of my wife and daughters. All my energies went into that, and I did not have time or concentration to have any ministry among church leaders. Each of our family members also died a kind of death: Lyn with her terrible fight for life, Lauren and Heather with their confusion about whether their mom would live (not to mention adjusting to life in the USA which they no longer identified with).

One lesson I learned was not to pay much attention to the medical percentages they tell you. Lyn was given a certain percentage chance of dying from the transplant. Then she had a certain percentage chance of not surviving the exposure to germs, having no immune system. One day God spoke to me very clearly and said: I only want you to pay attention to one percentage–that I am 100% in control. (God continued…) If I choose to heal, it will happen 100% no matter how hopeless the doctors are. And no matter how good a percentage the doctors give, she will only get better if I say so. So trust Me 100%.

I decided that would be my approach, and Lyn heartily agreed.

That is what the crucified life is…when you place yourself 100% into the control and care of God.  When you have such a death-like experience, commit yourself into the hands of God 100%. There is a peace in that place that is indescribable.

Next I’ll describe my burial-like experience.





My Passion Story, part 1

30 08 2011

I am a missionary and the thing that motivated me to get into this aspect of ministry was the overarching mandate from Jesus to go and make disciples of all peoples. If there is any command I don’t want to overlook, that’s it. The very last words Jesus spoke on earth said that we, his followers, would receive the power of the Holy Spirit to be His witnesses to our Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria and the uttermost part of the earth (Acts 1:8).

But here is a confession you may not expect to hear from a missionary: I have always found it a challenge to share the gospel because most people don’t seem eager to hear about it. This was true in California when I was a pastor, and (this may surprise you) it was even true in Kenya where our family did missionary work for 10 years.

So I have thought a lot about how to share my love for Christ more effectively in a world that doesn’t care to hear about it. Over the last 10 years God has taught me something about that. Here is what I have come to see: People need to see that Jesus loved them so much that He died for them, was buried for them, and rose from the dead…for them. But how can they see that?

Here is what God has taught me: People will see the dead-buried-risen Christ as they observe one of Jesus’ followers go through the same process, while still holding on to their faith. (I don’t know if you caught the weight of that sentence. If you breezed over it, please read it again.)

They will see a Christian going through a death-like experience…

…a burial-like experience…

…and a resurrection-like experience.

That is what I have come to call my Passion story, for it is the retelling of the Passion of Christ through our lives today.

Not only do I want to write about my Passion story on this blog. I believe you have a passion story to tell–in which you died a kind of death, you endured a kind of burial, and you had (or will have) a kind of resurrection.

That’s the story I’ll be telling here. I hope you will follow along.

  People will see the dead-buried-risen Christ as they observe one of Jesus’ followers go through the same process.





God’s kingdom requires changed thinking

21 08 2011

The first recorded words of Jesus in Mark’s gospel crystallize Jesus’ message: “The time is fulfilled, and the kingdom of God is at hand. Repent, and believe in the gospel” (Mark 1:15 NKJV).

“Repent” (Gk. metanoia) means to change your thinking. No matter how lofty or admirable, the way one thinks prior to joining God’s kingdom must be altered. How must thinking change? Jesus clarified, “Believe in the gospel.” Joining the kingdom requires a change of our thoughts to align with the good news in Jesus Christ. Where we did not formerly need Jesus, we now place our trust in Him. Where we formerly held our own explanation of where we came from and why we are here, we now accept God’s revelation on these vital question. Where we formerly lived according to our own common sense, we now submit to the instructions given us by our King Jesus. Where we used to live for ourselves, we now serve others as an expression of our love for God.

All this is done because, having discarded our former way of reasoning, we now “believe,” i.e. we embrace God’s way by faith. Choosing the kingdom should not be construed as a slight alteration or an add-on. No, it is a transference of citizenship from the kingdom of darkness in which all were born, into the kingdom of light into which we can be born again. It is to change from self-reliance to surrender. One cannot reason his way into God’s kingdom, for there is too much mystery in it. One cannot demand certain proofs of God, for the nature of the kingdom consists more of faith in the unseen than evidence of the seen.

Perhaps that is why Jesus said that one must become as a child to enter His kingdom (Mt. 18:3). This is not a dumbing-down of its requirements. Rather, it explains that simple, accepting trust is what clears away the hubris which blocks our view of God. Repentance opens up a panorama of possibilities in living God’s way.





Just focus on today

16 08 2011

“Casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you” (1 Peter 5:6-7)

Two incredible realities: I may cast my concerns onto God, and He cares enough to receive them. But my care-casting will be limited unless I truly acknowledge that the “mighty hand of God” sovereignly directs my circumstances. God knows where I am and what I am facing. My situation is no mystery to Him.

In a similar vein, Jesus taught us (in Matthew 6:34) to see today (not this week, or year, but today) as a manageable portion to apply our trust to the mighty hand of God. Don’t worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow will be there with its own manageable portion. “Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” The measure of a day is a gift of God to help us focus our faith on a reasonable amount of concern and work. Worry results from grabbing concerns beyond today.

God gives me the energy I need to accomplish His will today. I could wish for more, but that is not His assignment. God gives me all the time I need to accomplish His will today. Again, I could wish for more, but that is not His assignment.

In fact, who knows but I might throw into misalignment His allotment if I strive to be or do more than my portion. My weakness may be the occasion for someone else to be strong. That which I don’t accomplish may create opportunity for another to minister.

Is this an excuse for mediocrity? No. Rather, it is an invitation to contentment and trust.